June 12th, 2002



Working mornings starting today..

Kinda got an additional job, at work.. We're going through some changes, for the positive supposedly, and they're gonna be sending home info to people about what's going on, in form of a small "magazine", and.. I've seen the note about they looking for people doing it.. But didn't go for it.. it's only a limited thing anyway.. But.. last Friday one was asking me if I had applied, and today, another one asked me if I were interested, and had talked with the one being in charge for that little project.. so.. I ended up getting work on that project as well..

Went to the "city" after work, to get some stuff.. and.. well.. Got down there just in time to get under roof, since it started to really rain hard.. Kinda fun seeing groups of people etc, standing and waiting below the roofs that covers the "sidewalks"..

Didn't find much to buy tho... nothing special, at least..

Got home and had some new DVDs (10 of them) waiting for me.. (a list of them are in luka91_reviews), and.. a postcard from irlucid in Texas.. and it made me both real happy and real sad.. Happy because it was real nice getting the postcard.. sad, because it reminded me of Texas, and how I'd love to go back there.. There's been a lot of those thoughts lately.. The Lewis vs. Tyson boxing in The Pyramid in Memphis, Tennessee, as an example.. I've not been into it.. but.. I parked outside of it, on the other side of the street, and walked next to it.. trying to find a spot where I could photograph the river..

There's been a lot of small stuff like that, lately.. that brings back the memories..


At times, I actually regret having found her dead body. Now, of course, that was a stupid idea. It wasn't exactly a choice. I just found her. It's not as much waking up from the nightmares, or anything like that. Even if that's bad. It's mostly a wish that the memory, all the wonderful moments we had together, hadn't been replaced by the grotesque way her murderer had made her look, that made me regret having found her.

Creativity 2

He ran into the room, making sure that the door got properly closed and locked. He backed away from the door, keeping an eye on it as if to see that it stayed shut. He backed all the way until he bumped into the wall on the other side, where he, exhausted, sat down. Hiding his head in his arms. He didn't know for how long, but probably longer than it felt. In the end, he was able to calm down, and stand up. It was dark in the room. "Had it really been that dark when he entered it", briefly went through his head.. Whatever. He didn't like it. He had never been afraid of the dark, actually found it comforting a lot of the time. But that was before. He moved cautiously towards the door. Tense, as if he expected it to fling open any moment. He put his ear towards the door, but couldn't hear anything. A weird thought ran through his head, "whatever it was, it might be next to the door on the other side, listening for him". The thought made him take a quick step backwards. He hit something that tumbled over and crashed loudly unto the floor and made his heart skip what felt like a lot of beats. Even if he knew he couldn't help it, he got angry on himself for being so reckless. Maybe, just maybe, the thing that was in the house had lost track of him, or if he'd been able to avoid being noticed in the first place, whatever. The least thing he wanted, was for it to found out.