I guess you can call it some kind of getting my life in line for the new year or something..
I've sorted my favorites in IE.. gonna sort mails in OE in various sub-folders.. Obviously.. gonna sort a lot of stuff on my computer, back it up etc.. and possibly reformat..
Also gonna sort up a stuff in my apartment..
That's for various reason.. whatever, I felt like a need to get my life in the right tracks again.. Some of you might know that, but.. I've been in a slight regression when it came to my apetite for life.. a slow decline I didn't really notice, except that sometime in May - June, it was.. well.. pretty bad.. Not that I felt that unhappy or anything.. Just say I was just bored about everything.. not feeling like doing anything at all.. not until I came in contact with frida who, well.. lets say.. she's a big giant sun who spread her light and warmth on me, and made me.. well.. she re-charged my batteries (more about all that (about my running out of steam) in a later post).
As you know, all this sorting of stuff has included me sorting out my Friends List, deleting about 50 people out of it.. Not as much because of them being boring or anything (well.. some of them I admit I've kinda grown apart from, or whatever.. Finding myself not being able to care the least about what they were doing etc, but that weren't that many actually).
It was more about my own limitations.. Not being able to keep up, and in that sense, feel I were betraying a lot of the people on my list.. Not being able to care as much as I wanted for those I really care a lot for on my list.. and in the end, feeling really lousy about it..
Wanting so much to keep up, but feeling I ended up further and further behind.. feeling so lousy of not being able to keep up.. (including other things I should do.. writing I should do.. photographing.. a lot of stuff.. I promised wens a CD sometime months ago.. the gnereal listlessness get in the way at first.. I got around to burn the CD (and some more).. but.. still haven't gotten around to write out the sleeve-notes and get that package in the mail :( And.. I really feel bad about that, for sure, since wens is among the ones I feel the most for on my list of Friends).
I had to do something..
The ironic thing is that, well.. the Friends list only works in one direction.. it allows people to read your friends only posts.. and they do turn up on your Friends Page.. The thing is.. None of the ones I've deleted are people I want to shut out of reading what I write, including the Friends only posts.. (if it were sensitive material, I would post it as a Custom Friends only), but.. when I feel I've got them on my Friends List, I should read them.. all of them.. including those I doesn't really care that much about... That way, I kinda had to delete all of those, wanting it or not.. Even if, in the end, I might add most of them back.. The interesting thing, is that I've only lost about 10 people so far.. Even if I'm not gonna read all of them.. Those who wants to read me, even if I don't read their journals, are welcome to do that and keep me on their Friends List.
Now, I read everyone's journal directly at their Journal, rather than using my Friends Page and have set it up so that I've got a Subscription link to all journals in the favorites of IE. There's several reasons for this.. it's easier to sort in the Favorites, as well as knowing when someone has updated, but.. also.. I lost trust in my Friends Page when all posts didn't show up.. reading it in the journals, I at least know I'm not missing any posts.. The second reason is because it's easier to get a continuation, the development, when you see several posts after each other, rather than reading a post, of one person, here and there.. The third reason is. I've found myself reading the posts a lot better when reading in the journals, since.. on the Friends Page, I tend to skim a lot, if it doesn't catch my attention directly..
Also.. some of you have tremendous design, and really does a lot with your journals, and it would be a shame of reading your posts out of that context.
Now, I'm still gonna make up some Friends Groups.. both for reading and posting.. (and it's gonna be matched in the favorites..)
Now, I'm gonna present those groups, and.. well.. I want to be open about my feelings about things.. For good and worse.. I guess the main reason being that I don't want to pretend something else, as well as letting you know where I stand, and you can decide what you feel about it..
I'm gonna have an "Always Read" Group, which is the ones I feel the closest to, those who's special and interests me the most.. The ones that I never ever wants to miss out reading.. for several reasons..
anniz, frida, gwendoline, jema, katti, kimbis, littlesue1971, matttt, montfort, mosby722, nakedfairy, setolbert, shiiizzzam, siljebabe, spidra, the_mothers, lorelei_aisling and wens.
Then I've got a second group: "always_extension", featuring additions to the above group.. The "always_read" group is only if I'm really short on time etc.. this is.. well.. the second most interesting and closest people, which I would read next, if I have the time at that moment.. Special ones that kinda end up between the former group and the next group..
acoolsecretary, bertrande, cathgrey, evilshell, forsberg21, gale_storm, grastix, jenny_li, justdontcare, nemesticide, vblackangelv, zebraartist
The next group one might say is the default group, and the one I'm gonna use the most.. The people I want to read daily and keep up with.. "Daily (public)" Group. Obviously containing all the above as well..
acoolsecretary, annalytical, anniz, apriljoy, bertrande, the_dibbler, champagnekysses, dallandra, dawnm70, evilshell, faeryguinevere, forsberg21, frida, gale_storm, grastix, gwendoline, qwyneth6y, herlife, hlu, irlucid, jema, jenny_li, justdontcare, katti, kimbis, kissekatt, lisy_babe, littlesue1971, matttt, mindcrime, miravisu, montfort, mosby722, nakedfairy, nemesticide, globetrotter1, fuctbydesign, raptorgirl, razzberee, redpirk, reebert, setolbert, shiiizzzam, siljebabe, laudenum, spidra, tazmania6507, the_mothers, lorelei_aisling, uvaspina, vblackangelv, vivaboheme, wens, nangijala and zebraartist.
The rest of you (on my list at this moment) are in a group called "Check_in".. as in.. I can't promise I'll keep up with you every single day etc, but.. I'll try to check in on you every now and then.. so don't be surprised if I end up commenting on older stuff.. But... I will read most of what you write.. that, I can promise..
museaway, asteriskhere, atheenah, cathgrey, cyka, djibril, gigglecam, gunny, nerdork, lise_seth, meluseena, nico, orb8, photo_obscura, snowdrifter, vortex, xk8tx, zamzetta + most of second journals.. seeknow, jayphoto etc.. (since those aren't updated as often as well as not exactly day to day business).
Then, as I said.. I'm gonna start adding some people back.. not sure who yet.. (since I've not done it... ) but.. well.. It's people I still has feelings for.. the ones that was really, really hard deleting. It's like I'll never, ever read those again, but.. I admit it's not the highest priority.. When I do get time, and feel like sitting down and have a go at reading them, I'll do that..
For those of you who know me, I do think you understand how hard this has been on me.. matttt told me to be ruthless, and well... to some degree I was when deleting and sorting people.. at least I tried bringing some of that forward, but.. as some of you might know, I can't say I've got that much of ruthlessness in me to start with..
I guess that, even I I really hate it, one has to kinda put down a foot and say stop.. or I'll go totally insane.. (ok.. so if I went insane, then my journal might have been interesting to read.. but.. )
Whatever.. I love you all..